Boredom Versus Resistance: How to Know When to Quit?
Creative generalists (multi-passionate creatives) are a rare breed. We have more than one passion, and we don't want to choose just one path in life. But when boredom starts creeping in, it can be challenging to keep up the momentum of being creative or pursuing one or more of our interests. Resistance is often mistaken for boredom, but there's a difference between the two that you should know about if you're multi-passionate like many of my clients and me! In this article, I'll explore boredom versus resistance so you know when to quit on something and when it's time to push through and stay motivated.
Do you ever feel like giving up? Like all your efforts pointless? You're not alone! This feeling is known as boredom. It's when we no longer find a project or passion interesting enough to continue with. Often, we've reached what we came for in that project, job, or interest (usually some form of skill or new knowledge). We got what we wanted from it, so why would we want to keep going?
A new definition of done
We immerse ourselves into playing the guitar diligently every day for two years and then one day put the instrument to the side to not pick it up again for years. Or we decide we want to know everything there is to know about YouTube marketing, create the channel, buy all the courses, post a ton of videos, and suddenly decide to move on to something else.
Why do we do this? For most, finishing means an external endpoint, not for creative generalists. It's more an internal feeling of being done (bored) with something than anything else, often when, to the outside world, we don't seem done at all.
On the other hand, resistance shows up when something is important to us, when we're hitting on what matters most or makes us come alive. It's an inner feeling of not wanting to do something, even though we know deep down we want to or we should, often disguised as stress, anxiety, or fear.
Is it boredom or resistance?
For creative generalists, boredom is the internal feeling of not wanting to do something anymore because it feels like a chore when we've reached what we want from that project, job, or interest and feel no need to push through anymore.
On the other hand, resistance is a biological and evolutionary response to things that are important to us. It's a protection mechanism that is rooted in our fight-or-flight response. What resistance wants is for everything to stay the way it is. So although boredom and resistance can feel pretty much the same, they're each other's opposites! Boredom is a gentle nudge that you need change; resistance is a - often much harder - blow that you want things to stay the same, precisely when you should be moving forward!
Resistance is when we should push through boredom or whatever else we're feeling - fear, lack of self-confidence, doubt, self-loathing, procrastination - and continue with what we're doing for some other, more profound reason. It's that feeling of "I don't want to do this, but I just know it's the right thing for me" because it matters more than anything else in your life right now.
How to know the difference between boredom and resistance?
Knowing the difference between boredom and resistance can help you understand when to quit something and when to push through. Boredom means it's time for a change, while resistance is the only way we can get back in touch with what matters most right now.
If you're not sure whether you're experiencing boredom or resistance, here are some questions to ask yourself:
What is my goal with this project, job, or interest?
Have I reached that goal?
Do I still find this project, position, or interest interesting?
Why do I want to quit?
What would happen if I did leave?
Would I regret quitting later?
Answering these questions can help you determine whether you're experiencing boredom or resistance. If you're bored, it might be time to move on to something new. But if you're feeling resistance, it's probably because there's something vital that you need to do! Instead of quitting, take stock of what's going on emotionally. How are you feeling? What is that telling you about what you're trying to resist?
When to quit?
There's no shame in admitting that you're bored of something or ready for something new. It doesn't mean that you're a quitter or not good at it. It means that you've reached a point where you no longer want to continue with that project, job, or interest. And that's perfectly okay!
In summary, here's how to know when to quit:
The critical difference between boredom and resistance is that boredom feels like the project or job has become too easy. You've learned everything you wanted or needed to know from it, so the boredom feeling is our body telling us to move on and try something new.
Resistance happens when we're doing something important to us, or that needs our attention for other reasons. It feels like, "I don't want to do this, but I have to because it matters more than anything else."
If you're not sure whether you're experiencing boredom or resistance, refer to the questions above to find more clarity.
The most important thing to remember about being ready to move on to something else like a (multi-passionate) creative or entrepreneur is that your cut-off point, when you're "ready" with something, will often be different from that of other, more specialist people. So it's useless to mirror your actions to what they would do. They don't have your multi-passionate brain, and they're not you. How could you then know what you need or what is suitable for you?
So if you're feeling bored, it might be time to move on. But if you're feeling resistance, it's probably because there's something important that you need to do! Push through and see what happens!
Feeling stuck in your career or business?
You're not alone. Many people find themselves at a crossroads, not sure what to do next. That's where I come in - I'm a career and business coach with almost ten years of experience helping people figure out their next steps.
Quit your job? Start your own business? There are many options, and it can be tough to know which one is right for you. That's where I come in – I can help you figure out what to do next and put together a plan to help you achieve your goals.
