Breaking Up With Your Job: When Passion Burns Out and It's Time to Move On
Even though I've been an entrepreneur for over two decades, I know what it feels like to break up with a job. I've had my share of corporate projects and freelancing contracts that stopped lighting me up after a while, and that I simply had to leave.
Leaving a job is a lot like breaking up with someone. At first, it's all fireworks and heart-eyed emojis. But slowly, the magic fizzles, and you can't remember why you fell in love. Maybe your boss is the clingy type who texts you at 3 a.m. with “emergencies,” or perhaps your once-thrilling work has become as monotonous as folding laundry. Whatever the reason, the spark is gone, and you're left wondering how to part ways with a job that you once thought would be your happily ever after.
But, my fellow career explorers and relentless seekers of inspiration and fulfillment, this isn't the end. It's a crossroads that can lead to something new and wonderful. Like a perfect storm, this might just be the nudge you need to guide you toward a path that aligns with you more. The reason you don't like your job anymore might not be because the job has changed. Perhaps it's you who has outgrown it.
I'm here to guide you through the steps of such professional uncoupling. In this article, let's explore how to break up with your job when the passion is gone so you can move forward with your career and find a job you love.
Recognizing it's time for a professional goodbye
When I was in my twenties, I thought I had it all figured out. I was passionate about my work and believed that passion would never fade. I was building my web agency and enjoyed every part of it. But as the years went on, I felt like something was missing. The passion I once had for my work was gone. Then, my parents passed away five weeks apart from each other. It was the final straw that made me realize that I needed a change.
It doesn't need to be a dramatic event like I had to go through, but at some point, something will make us face the cold truth that the job that once felt so exciting now feels like a dead weight chained to our ankles. It's not an easy feeling, especially when you've dedicated time and energy, years in my case, to building something for yourself.
As I mentioned in my book, the breaking point is different for everyone. Maybe your creativity has suffered, or your once-quiet office has become a crowded tearoom where you can't find a minute to think. There could be a number of reasons or a single, clear sign telling you that it's time to move on. The important thing is to listen.
Love the job you're with, or move on?
I know it's a cliché, but there's truth to the saying, "Find a job you love, and you'll never have to work a day in your life." The question is, was that job truly love for you or was it more like a fling? There's no shame in wanting more or seeking a career you're passionate about. You want it in your romantic relationships and deserve it in your professional life, too.
So what now? After you realize that you no longer love the job you're in, where do you go from there? Do you stay or do you go? Thinking about starting over or making a significant career change can be scary and overwhelming. But remember, this is your life, and you deserve to live it fully and passionately. Never let fear stop you from doing something you want to do, and certainly don't let it keep you from pursuing your dreams.
Rekindling the spark - or is it too late?
Sometimes, the love isn't over; it's just hiding, buried under the routine of the daily grind. Perhaps all you need is a little counseling and a professional therapist for your work life. I always tell clients that, before they take the leap, they should reach out to mentors, work with a career coach, and look for opportunities within their current company that may reignite the passion they once felt.
It’s essential to figure out if it's helpful to do the work to fix what's wrong or if the issue is simply irreparable.
The road to career satisfaction is not always straight - often, we take detours. But with perseverance and a willingness to figure out what's wrong, sometimes (not often), it's possible to rekindle the spark you a job you once loved.
Crafting your career path - the friendly breakup
As someone who has been helping creatives and entrepreneurs get unstuck for a decade now, I know how creating a plan for the next steps in your career can feel daunting, like when you decide to "put yourself out there" after a breakup. It’s exciting, invigorating, and scary, especially when you've been in a job that is stressful or bores you out for a long time.
You can start by creating a career roadmap of where you want to be in six months, a year, and three years. What do these milestones look like? What industry or roles are you looking for? You'll need some clarity to take the first step towards your ideal job. (If you need some guidance with this, I can help!)
Make sure that, as you go through with this breakup, you do it amicably. This is the best advice my father ever gave me. Burning bridges means you can never cross the river again, but in our professional lives, the river has more twists and turns than a Tom Clancy novel. Respect your current role, boss, and your colleagues (even if they've been crappy to you, don't leave slamming doors if you can). Give notice, be open about your reasons for leaving, and be willing to help make the transition as smooth as possible (expect if they've been real d*cks with you). How you exit will influence the next chapters of your career, and you want those stories to be ones of grace and dignity.
The post-breakup glow-up - finding that new job!
When you've been under pressure for a long time, knowing you need to do something about your situation while being stuck in overthinking and hesitating, finally breaking up can be liberating. Believe me, I know. I have a few projects (and exes, ahum) that I lingered with for way too long. When you finally cut ties, it's the perfect time to redefine yourself and address the parts of your professional life that no longer serve you.
Take your time with the healing process; take the time to learn and grow from this transition. Use this time to reflect on what you truly want in your career and take steps toward achieving those goals. It could be taking a course, networking with people in the industry you want to enter, or updating your LinkedIn profile.
Remember to stay true to yourself throughout this process. Don't let outside pressure and influences keep you from pursuing what truly makes you happy. This is your journey, and embracing change and finding your passion is a rebellious act that will ultimately lead to personal growth and fulfillment.
The role and benefits of a career coach
Trying to figure out your next career move alone can be challenging. This is where a career coach - like Moi - can play the role of your professional wingman, your relationship advisor for the professional world. A good and experienced career coach can help you assess your skills and passions, identify your career goals, and help create a strategy to find a job you'll love.
As a career coach, I guide my clients in times of uncertainty and change. My path to becoming a career coach wasn't a straight line; it resulted from my journey, trials, lessons, and a desire to change careers and help others do the same. I understand the courage it takes to question the familiar, to stand at the cliff of your future, and dare to dream of more. My approach is deeply personal because I believe each person is unique, and no single blueprint can fit us all.
If you want to know more, I poured everything I learned in the decade I've been doing this work in my book called "Get Unstuck!" Click here to get your copy now.
If you're looking for more personalised support, we can work together one-on-one to explore not just the "what" of your next steps but the "why" and the "how," creating a strategy that aligns with what you want and your deepest values and aspirations. It's more than finding a job; it's about imagining and creating a career that fills your life with purpose and joy.
That job you love is waiting for you, I know because I've been helping people just like you find theirs for ten years now, and I'm here to help you find it too!