How Sarah became a textile designer

I had the pleasure of meeting Sarah at a screen printing workshop she was teaching. I was immediately struck by the clarity with which Sarah was able to explain the technical aspects of screen printing, but also – and more importantly – how at ease she was with her own creativity, and mine. In the most gentle way Sarah pushed me forward, helped me to dig deeper so I could find that spark within myself.

When I meet rare humans like Sarah, I need to know more. How did they figure things out, build their careers, go after their big dreams? So here’s how Sarah became a textile designer and created her own label of interior objects.

What was your big dream, and what inspired you to go after it?

It’s a difficult one to answer because finding out what your big dream is, is not a fixed thing for me. I see it more like a constantly evolving process. In fact, during some periods of my life trying to define my big dream was more a stress factor than a blessing.

It felt like I had to have one otherwise it was as if I didn’t mean a thing or I didn’t even exist. I couldn’t find one thing because I have many passions and don’t like to put myself in a particular box while there are so many things I’m interested in.

It was hard work to let go of trying to figure things out, but the moment I did everything unfolded in front of me. I realized that my dream was already in me and in everything that surrounded me. I just needed some distance to observe what was already going on and look at what I did best, believe in my skills and do what I love the most, regardless what other people think of it.

The thing that I love to do and do best is to create and to help others through my creativity and art. I love to awaken the power to create that I believe is in everyone of us. Creativity helps you to be real, free and simply you. It doesn’t need to be perfect either. Whatever is being created is good enough in it’s own unperfected, raw way of existence. As long as it’s made in an honest dialogue with yourself it’s actually perfect.

Did you always had this dream?

I think it’s always been there, I just tried a lot of different roads to get to this point.

What was one of the first thing you did to get you started?

Go out there and try things out. Don’t be afraid to enter the work field, meet people, confront yourself, experiment as much as you can. It will help you figure out what you need, and what you don’t.

What were the biggest challenges you faced in working toward achieving your dream?

Sometimes you make decisions or you start projects that don’t turn out the way you want.  Some of those decisions have huge consequences.

The biggest challenge is not to see it as a personal failure, but instead to see those moments as valuable lessons. When you fail, take your time to heal yourself, be kind to yourself and take a fresh look at the situation. Asking yourself what the problem was, and how you can react differently next time will make you stronger and more prepared for the unprepared that will eventually follow when you start something new after your “failed” project.

What do you wish you would have done differently? What would you warn others about?

Sometimes I wish I would have regained my self-confidence a bit sooner. Being mad at myself, or disappointed, and harsh for yourself takes a lot of energy and keeps you stuck in a negative spiral.

When that happens there’s no room for something new to emerge. On the other hand, sometimes things take the time they need to ground. In the end, it is what it is. So overall I don’t have much regrets.

Would you say you’ve achieved your dream yet?

I’m living it. I’m grateful for what I have, what I can do, what I’ve been given and I’m blessed with the perfect daughter, a funky family and golden friends!

What do you think helped you achieve it?

Never giving up, and keep on building and working in a loving positive way. Loving myself, and surrounding myself with things and people that are good for me!

What’s the best advice you have for others who want to follow their dreams?

Be honest with yourself. Also accept the hard things that come your way. Life is good as it is, duality is part of it and keeps the balance we need.

Sarah teaching during the first session of the screen printing workshop I attended.

More about Sarah – sarahpatoor.com

Sarah grew grew up in an artistic family. Her parents taught her the importance of developing her personal talent. Through this encouragement, and subsequent studies at art school, she formed skills and a way of looking and searching. That foundation of questioning, and responding to things led to an interesting process that keeps evolving.

For the last fourteen years Sarah has lived and worked in Antwerp as a freelance textile designer. This includes creating patterns for different purposes, coloration of collections, styling of interiors, designing exhibition stands, creating trend boards, and so on. She’s also developing an own label of interior objects. The label stands for high quality, locally manufactured objects, with a clear artistic vision behind them. They’re made in limited productions, each production has its own story.

You can find our more about Sarah, and her work at sarahpatoor.com, or follow her on Instagram @patoorsarah

Sarah’s favorite quote:

It’s everyone’s right to be a white raven, envolez-vous et suivez votre rêve.

Sarah’s big dream for the world:

Love, light and connection.

If you want more inspiring stories I’ve got great news for you! This story is part of an interview series, you can find all entries here.

How to overcome your fear of failure

One of the cornerstones of the work that I do with my clients is to first deconstruct the belief system they’ve build around themselves and their dreams. Very often this is one of the main blocks stopping them from going after what they want.

Within that belief system the fear of failure takes a central role. The culture we live in is a culture of winners, where failure is seen as something bad that needs to be avoided. As women this translates into us easily being seen as helpless when we fail, with society ready to come to our rescue by letting us know it’s OK not to pursue our dreams. When we try and fail we’re not motivated to try again, but rather dusted off and put back into the good girl box, confronted with the cultural bias that it isn’t for us in the first place, that we’re not supposed to be winners anyway.

Because of this many women fear failure. It’s hard enough to step out of comfort zones, and go against what society wants us to believe about ourselves. When we fail – or think about failing – our biggest fear comes up: that we’re simply not good enough.  The truth is there’s no growth, no change, no progress without some failure too.

Failure is an essential learning experience to get to where you want to go. If you already knew exactly how to get there you wouldn’t fail – true – but you’d already be there!

How to overcome your fear of failure?

Here are 3 tips that have helped me and many of my clients to overcome their fear of failure. I hope they’ll be helpful for you too.

• Change your belief system about failure

Failing is not something bad that needs to be avoided at all costs. In fact, it’s one of the fastest ways to learn. In order to overcome your fear of failure it’s important to change your belief system about what it really is.

Failure doesn’t define you. It has nothing to do with who you are. Failure doesn’t mean that you’re not good enough, or smart enough. It only teaches you something. Probably a valuable lesson. By changing your belief system about failure you’re giving yourself space to experiment, play, and learn. Essential practices to dream bigger, and achieve your goals.

• Remember that everyone fails

There’s no such thing as overnight success. Everyone who ever achieved anything failed miserably – probably a gazillion times – before succeeding. History is full of stories of big dreamers who went on yearlong journeys of failure before becoming the successes they’re known to be today. Just think of Oprah, J.K. Rowling, Lady Gaga.

That’s why I love reading biographies. By learning about the struggles that others came across their journeys to success, I’m empowered to dream bigger and believe I can do it to. Here’s a couple that I particularly like:

Oprah Winfrey: A Biography
Michelle Obama: A Life
Gloria Steinem: My Life on the Road
I Am Malala: The Girl Who Stood Up for Education and was Shot by the Taliban
Angela Davis: An Autobiography

• What’s the worst that could happen?

When everything else fails (pun intended) I love to ask myself this question. This powerful question is a miracle worker. Both for myself, and my clients. When the fear of failure becomes so strong that it causes procrastination or indecision it’s my go-to mantra. By asking myself what’s the worst that could happen I almost always realize the worst possible outcome is far better than not taking a chance at all.

I invite you to try it out for yourself. Think about what it is you want to do. Now think about what would happen – and I mean really happen – if you failed. Chances are your ego might be bruised a bit, and you might have to go back to the drawing tables and rework your plan. But… will the world end? Will everything in your life fall apart? Will you grow a second pair of legs? Probably not.

If you want more tips to get unstuck, I’ve got great news for you! This tip is part of a series, you can find all entries here.

How Kristien became a horse trainer and traveling trail guide

Kristien is a multi-passionate woman with a bachelor degree in Psychology and a master in Theatre and Film. She first started out working in marketing and PR and later decided to specialize in fashion. Although Kristien seemed to follow her interests and come across engaging opportunities; she soon realized being stuck in an office all day staring at a computer screen wasn’t for her.

To find a job to match her talents turned out to be a challenge. Something always felt a bit off. That’s when I met Kristien. I’d coached Kristien’s sister, and after a successful coaching series with her she asked me if I could coach her sister.

Strengthened by the support of coaching Kristien realized her childhood dream of working with horses and being in touch with Nature was still very much alive. By the end of her 3 months of coaching she secured her first job as a horse trail guide, and was off to live out her life’s adventure.

Today, Kristien has two magnificent experiences under her belt, respectively in Hungary and South Africa, both working as a Trail Guide with horses. Soon she’s headed for Portugal where she’ll be working with Lusitanos, a proud Portuguese breed of horses.

What was your big dream, and what inspired you to go after it?

Life works in strange ways; you grow up and all kinds of things become important that weren’t before: what others think, what’s cool (especially when puberty kicks in), (first) love … Those things can easily side-track you from what you really want and soon I found myself lost and trying all kinds of studies and career choices that didn’t seem to fulfill me. I didn’t have a clue about what I wanted anymore. I pursued different things and lost my calling.

Finally I met you; in my opinion at the perfect time. I knew something had to give and I was open to receive the help that I knew I somehow (despite all of my enthusiasm) needed. What I truly craved for was someone who told me it was OK to change direction, to dig deep and disregard what all others desired of me and most of all to have someone by my side who believed in me.

It was only then that I could realize what my big dream was: working with horses and living an adventurous life.

Did you always had this dream?

Since I was young I just loved Nature, animals in particular. It was my escape from the human world, going into the woods and discovering the magical realm that lies beyond. I always felt that connection to Nature but that didn’t mean I listened to my gut feeling.

What was one of the first thing you did to get you started?

A life changer was the reading and workbook material you recommended to me.

When I started my sessions with you I wanted to start my own styling business – believe it or not. What the material did for me was to re-evaluate what I really wanted to do with my life. I was taken back to my childhood, I had to dig deep and think about my own style and what truly makes me happy in life.

What were the biggest challenges you faced in working toward achieving your dream?

What’s still a major hurdle, is the opinion of others. Let’s face it, 90% of the people who surround us lead traditional lives. When someone suddenly breaks out of the regular way of doing things people take notice and will have an opinion about it.

Reactions I faced for example were: ‘Oh poor girl, she’s still finding her way, she’ll realize how life works eventually’. Also within my family it was hard to be taken seriously. That being said, I couldn’t have undertaken this journey without their love and support. In general though, it seems that whenever you take a different path, you’ll have to find a way to prove yourself even more.

What do you wish you would have done differently? What would you warn others about?

The only regret I have is not doing this earlier!

Sometimes I wonder: what would my life have been like if I followed my true passion earlier? How much further would I have been reaching my goals? Of course I realise a lot of things happen for a reason and my guess is I probably wasn’t ready yet and still had some lessons to learn.

My life has always been interesting so I can’t complain too much but I do feel everything makes more sense now I know what I’m working towards. So my advice is don’t let your life drag on, let it take the right direction in which everything naturally flows!

Would you say you’ve achieved your big dream yet?

Absolutely … NOT! And thank goodness for that, it’s so much fun to keep on learning and growing. It will take time but time I have. As they say, it’s all about the process.

What do you think helped you achieve it?

An open mind, can do attitude, and the energy and willingness to change my life. Career coaching sessions with you, and the support of (a) special someone(s).

What’s the best advice you have for others who want to follow their big dreams?

Don’t be afraid when your goal starts to change over time. At first I wanted my experience to be all about Natural Horsemanship. But when I was at a horse festival in Portugal I suddenly thought: wow, this is where I want to be, these are the majestic horses I want to work with, this is the culture I want to experience … and when suddenly the opportunity arose, I simply took it. Although it wasn’t what I initially saw for myself.

Be ready to be flexible with your dreams. Before you know it your initial dream will come knocking at the door again and it all will seem to intertwine naturally.

Kristien working as a trail guide in Hungary

More about Kristien

Kristien is a multi-passionate horse trainer and traveling trail guide with a Natural Horsemanship perspective. Her next stop is Portugal, but who knows where her big dreams will lead her next?

You can follow Kristien’s travels, and adventures on Instagram @fiery_manes

Kristien’s favorite quote:

People only get really interesting when they start to rattle the bars of their cages.

– Alain de Botton

Kristien’s big dream for the world:

For horses to be treated as the magnificent creatures they are, with the respect they deserve. For animals in general to not be used for our never ending need of consumption anymore – I’m aiming to become a vegetarian. For people to believe in themselves and others instead of a higher power.

And of course … world peace ;)!

If you want more inspiring stories, I’ve got great news for you! This story is part of an interview series, you can find all entries here.

5 networking tips for creative entrepreneurs

Networking is a skill that doesn’t come naturally to everyone. Many multi-passionate creatives, freelancers and entrepreneurs have a complicated relationship with networking. It’s true for me, but I know it’s true for many other people as well. Networking can feel really uncomfortable, especially if you’re not a “one size fits all” person and juggle many interests and passions. How do you even respond to the "So, what do you do?" question?

To various degrees introverts, ambiverts, but even extroverts can struggle with it. Unfortunately, we can’t stick our head in the sand and forget all about it, because in this day and age, networking is a necessity. Whatever you’re trying to achieve knowing people that can support you, offer new perspectives, and help you forward is powerful.

If you think of networking as a way of meeting people you could help and also learn from, rather than a way to push your services or products, you might start seeing networking in a more positive light.

I believe that the biggest issue most people have with networking is the preconceived ideas about what it is, and how it needs to be done. Networking used to be reserved for members of the Old Boys’ Club. For a long time anyone who didn’t fit the bill (or didn’t have the wallet) wasn’t invited. Then, as more outliers became part of the work force, they slowly found their way to networking. But to many it never really felt like home.

The rules of traditional networking are created by a select few, and so work best for them. If you’re not from that context you’ll communicate, and make connections differently. So we need a different kind of networking.

Michael Goldberg is a TEDx speaker, an award-winning adjunct professor at Rutgers University, and the owner of Knock Out Networking. He thinks networking can be serendipitous or strategic, and that they both can help you achieve your goals and dreams.

Serendipitous networking

Serendipitous networking is based on making the most out of every human interaction in your life. It means to introduce yourself to the person sitting next to you on a plane, to someone you’re stuck with in an elevator, to friends of your friends, to other parents at a parent-teacher conference, etc. You never know who the other person is, and it could very well be someone who could become a client or a business partner, or even a romantic interest.

Strategic networking

On the other hand, strategic networking involves having a plan. You need to know where to go (online or offline), what to say, and with whom exactly you want to connect. You need to know who you want to build a relation with – is it start-up CEOs, brand managers in a particular industry, people working in a specific niche you’re interested in?

As Michael Goldberg calls it, it’s all about the “we” dynamic. You want to introduce yourself, and build relations with those people you click with, so you can start using “we” in your conversations. “How can we help one another?”

People have very different reasons for building their social networks. Some do it for generating new business (and this can take many shapes and sizes – from boosting sales to raising funds for charity), others for landing a job, or meeting new friends, or figuring out how to get rid of an issue they’re having, or simply to learn something – about an industry, a job, a new skill. No matter you reason for doing it, is as valid as any other.

Many creatives think of networking as icky

Cassell (A. Ferere), editor in chief of Reverie Page and Fashion Contributor for Forbes, says the struggle is real: networking was a struggle when we did it in-person. Now it’s become an even bigger “digital” struggle. He offers a few helpful tips:

1. Set networking goals. If you know “why” you’re doing it, it’s going to be easier to connect.

2. Prepare to use someone’s time wisely. If you’re going to “borrow” someone’s time, as Cassell puts it, consider using it wisely.

3. Take the creative approach. What else can you do than participate in the dreaded online networking event? There are plenty of ways to connect with people and you, creative superstar, are capable to come up with uniques on how to do so.

Herminia Ibarra is one of the most influential management thinkers in the world and she offers, although focused on the networking struggles of women, 3 key reasons why strategic networking can be difficult for those who don’t feel at home in traditional networking situations:

1. They don’t find people similar to them during events. Even today when we’re thinking of high-ranking business leaders, we’re still mostly thinking of older (white) men. For anyone else looking to make strategic connections these events challenging and time-consuming.

2. Women’s social networks tend to overlap less than men’s. When women and men list the people they turn to for important work matters and then those they spend time with outside of the office, the lists look very different. For men, the two lists tend to overlap. Managing two separate lists implies more effort on women’s part. It also means that men will talk about business in various informal settings, building more trust and being better informed than women.

3. It can feel like using people. Herminia Ibarra points out that “the more we differ from key stakeholders, the more likely that we’ll see a more intentional approach as disingenuous and calculating — all about selfish gain, “using people” and engaging in unmeritocratic ways of advancing one’s career.”

5 Networking tips you can apply today

So, how do we, (multi-passionate) creatives, freelancers and creative entrepreneurs network efficiently, and without feeling weird about it? Here are 5 tips that help me to network with more ease and flow, and that might be useful to you as well:

#1 Have a 1-minute introduction ready

Before going to a networking event, take the time to write down your introduction, to say it out loud and to tweak it to fit into one minute while telling people all they should know about you. Michael Goldberg advises people to use his PEEC Statement for drafting the introduction:

Profession – who you are, what you do, with whom?
Expertise – what if your depth of knowledge? what are you an expert in?
Environment – what is the target market you’re interested in?
Call to Action – what is it that you’d want to achieve?

Here’s an example:

Hello! I’m X and I work as a film producer for small budget web series. You might have heard of Y and Z, they were just released on Facebook Watch. I’ve been involved in creating video content for the web for almost a decade, and now I’m more and more interested in creating content for Facebook’s audience. I’d love to find a brand who might finance a new web series we’re producing next summer.

If, like me, you don’t fit into a 1-minute introduction, these tips on how to introduce yourself as a creative generalist can help.

#2 Figure out what you have to offer

What sort of problems did you face and how did you solve them? What did you learn in your profession or business? What do you know that others might find interesting? Knowing what sort of ‘keywords’ the other people are waiting to pop up into conversations can help you build connections and mutually beneficial relationships easier.

For example, you don’t think of yourself as rich and powerful, but that doesn’t mean the group won’t find you valuable. There are many forms of capital, and money is just one of them. Maybe you know the best accountant in your city, how to source local organic products, or maybe someone in your family is dealing with a challenging condition, and now you know everything about it.

#3 Be present and interested in the person in front of you

Make it a habit to be the person asking most questions when you talk to someone. Don’t look around the room for the next person to approach while you still speak to the first. Interested people have the most interesting lives. It can even serve you to be a matchmaker. Matching people you talk to with people you know could help them is a powerful way to do something for others, while also strengthening your bond with them.

#4 Don’t enter People-Pleaser mode

Meeting people face to face might make you feel you’re under more pressure to say yes to things you’re not interested in. Remember you have the right to politely say “no, thanks” to anything. You don’t have to get coffee with everyone who invites you, and you don’t have to partner up with anyone you don’t match with well. Here are some ideas on how to say “no” graciously.

#5 Follow-up like a pro

If you meet someone you want to build a connection with, and they give you their contact info, follow-up in the next 48 hours. Don’t let them forget about you. Email them, call them – start cultivating the relationship thinking of the long-term gains. The same applies if you agree to do something for someone you met at a networking event – the sooner you do it, the better.

Now it’s your turn. What’s your best networking tip? Let me know.

Are you wondering about what to do next?

Do you have too many interests and don't know how to make them work together? If so, you're not alone. There are so many creative generalists out there with the same issue.

Luckily, it doesn't need to be this way! There are tools for making sense of all these different interests and skills, like my private coaching services, which help you find your "one amazing thing" (or two or three) because you know what: you don't have to choose!

Click here to schedule your free coaching session today!

How to take risks (without losing everything you have)

In today’s dream bigger tip I want to focus on the “bigger” part of the process. In everything we aim to achieve there’s a level of change involved. Learning a new language, starting a business, developing healthier habits, … whatever you decide to undertake change is what will take you from where you are right now to where you want to be.

If you’ve been dreaming small until now – that is if you haven’t acted on your big dreams because you believe those dreams are not for you or you don’t know where to start – dreaming bigger means changing the way you’ve conceived your dreams so far. This change – like any other – requires you to learn to be comfortable with what often feels like excruciating uncertainty. It means learning to take risks, and be OK with doing it.

Imagine your big dream is to start your own shop on Etsy. You create the most beautiful jewelry, that all your friends love. But your own business? Actually making money from your craft? That’s not for you. At least, that’s what you keep convincing yourself of. So you keep dreaming small.

In order to dream bigger you need to be willing to take risks. Try something new. Tell yourself, whatever the voice in your head is saying, that you can do it.

How to learn to take risks?

In what follows I share 3 things that have helped me to learn to take risks, and reprogram myself to dream bigger. Whatever your big dreams are, if you’ve been hesitant to pursue them because it feels “too risky”, these tips might help you get started.

• Dream big, but start small

What I hear most often when I’m working with clients, is that they don’t know where to start. The lack of clarity about what to do first sometimes comes from not knowing what they really want, but in many cases it’s the result of feeling overwhelmed by the daunting task to start working on achieving dreams that look like huge mountains.

I know it can be so overwhelming to look at your big dreams in their entirety, and ask yourself how you’ll ever be able to reach them. Like standing in flip flops, t-shirt and pink shorts at the foot of Mount Kilimanjaro, wondering how you’ll ever reach the top. The result of this type of overwhelm is often inaction. The risks to undertake the adventure are simply too great to even try – or so it seems.

That’s why it’s important to dream big, but start small. Instead of focusing on the mountain, focus on the first step you can take right now. Then take that step. It will help reduce the level of risk you think you’re taking, while actually moving you towards your goals.

• Remember that you can always change your mind

Another reason my clients often procrastinate on getting started with their big dreams is the fear that the choices they’ll make will be forever. This is a mistake our mind makes when we’re about to step into uncertainty. Leaving the familiar behind is one of the hardest things we can do. We’re programmed to like the comfort that comes from knowing what to expect, so jumping into the unknown often feels like one of the most important decisions we can make in our life.

Although deciding to change something in your life can feel like a decision you’ll have to live with forever, this simply isn’t true. It’s not because you start an Etsy shop today, that you have to commit to it forever.

Even if you make a decision that you end up regretting later on, there’s almost always a way back. Or at least another direction you can take that will get you closer to what you really want. That’s the beauty of being in charge of your life, and having the power to make decisions. And why risk taking is not so risky after all.

• Always fail forward

Change involves risk, but it also involves learning. Perhaps there’s even no real learning without at least a little risk taking. Inside our comfort zone we’re usually well aware of what we know, and what we don’t know. Learning requires us to step outside of it, and stretch ourselves a little more. It’s outside of our comfort zone, where risks are taken, that we open ourselves up for failure.

The fear of failure is one of the top reasons why so many women don’t follow their dreams. Unfortunately, as I’ve explained above, there’s no risk taking without risk of failing. And that’s actually OK. What needs to happen to dream bigger is not to avoid failure at all costs, but to reframe what failure really is, and to get rid of the notion that it’s bad to fail.

Failure is essential to growth, and part of the process. Learn to get comfortable with your mistakes, to see them as key learning moments, to fail forward.

If you want more tips to get unstuck, I’ve got great news for you! This tip is part of a series, you can find all entries here.

How Natalie is building her own beauty education brand

Natalie is a Makeup Artist & Beauty Coach, and the Founder of Natalie Setareh.

Natalie’s big dream is to empower women through beauty education. She believes makeup is a tool that has the power to truly transform how women feel inside, and to make them confident and comfortable in their own skin (with or without makeup). Here’s how she’s making her dream come true.

What was your big dream, and what inspired you to go after it?

I guess my big dream right now is to be the household name in education. Like the new Bobbi Brown! I truly believe that makeup is a tool and accessory that has the power to truly transform us (from the inside out) but there’s a lack of real, tangible, practical education on how to buy, wear, and use makeup in ways that suit our own unique self and personality.

Did you always had this dream?

I wish I could say I’ve had this dream my whole life but that wouldn’t be true. What’s true is that I’ve been doing makeup on others for as long as I can remember. I’ve also always had the dream of helping a lot of people without having to go to medical school (much to the dismay of my Persian father). Through the course of my adult and professional life, I followed a few different rabbit holes until one day, I decided to go for it and start Setareh Beauty, a new freelance makeup artist business. During the first few years, I was fine with my “freelancer” title. It wasn’t until recently when I started reflecting on client experiences, analyzing my testimonials, and watching how people engaged with my content that I realized I graduated to full-fledged business. See, in nearly everything that I created or wrote, things always pointed back to makeup and beauty industry education, and the empowerment found therein.

It was then when I discovered (lightbulb moment) that it’s SO much more than makeup. It’s about feeling empowered (to try new things and be your own makeup artist), be back in control (shutting out all the “buy-this, buy-that” clutter the beauty industry relentlessly sneaks into our pocketbooks), and confident (with or without makeup, making the choice for ourselves and owning it).

What was one of the first thing you did to get you started?

Aside from starting my business and shamelessly putting myself out there, working back-to-back weddings and long, long “hours for photos” days (or small amounts of money) in order to build my professional portfolio, I remember randomly being asked if I offered private lessons. Taken back (wait, I’m an ‘expert’?), I panicked but said “Yes, I do!”. I developed a private lesson structure that evolved into a workbook and sequence that would eventually become the major influence and backbone of my Makeup Reset Workshop Series.

My workshops have been the vehicle to my entry into beauty education. See, I wanted to offer the world an affordable, hands-on workshop where I encourage participants to bring their own makeup bags and learn instead of simply imitating. Participants follow along in this now 26-page book that I wrote by myself. A makeup artist colleague of mine even told me that my book was better and more comprehensive than the one she received in makeup school. And that’s saying something!

What were the biggest challenges you faced in working toward achieving your dream?

I’m knee deep in the challenge. As a woman, I wear so many hats. I wear the artist hat. The business owner hat. The wife hat. The mother hat. The friend hat. Etc. You get the idea.

Having an amazing gift to offer the world takes a team. It takes time. Patience. And a LOT of hard work. So finding time to make sure I work smartly towards getting my message out is always the challenge.

What do you wish you would have done differently? What would you warn others about?

I believe that everything I’ve done so far has led to where I’m now. I suppose I wish I would’ve, at a much younger age, been confident enough in myself to stand up to my family and show them that I got this whole “entrepreneur” thing down. I spent so many years of my life trying to prove I can climb the military officer ranks, corporate ranks, education ranks when really, I should’ve spent that time showing the world what I’m capable of building my own ranks, and climbing them on my own.

Would you say you’ve achieved your big dream yet?

Definitely not! But it’s within reach and sight!

What do you think helped you achieve it?

I wish I could say friends and family, because that’s the expected answer. And don’t get me wrong, they have supported me in so many ways and without their support I wouldn’t be able to keep creating and doing what I do.

But really, the most support I’ve received in my business and what has helped me achieve my dreams has been fellow entrepreneurs. Organizations like the Rising Tide Society and attending local Tuesday’s Together chapters. Tuesday’s Together meetings has been life-changing for my professional and personal growth. Having an entrepreneurial organization at my fingertips has been instrumental in my growth and realizing my dreams.

What’s the best advice you have for others who want to follow their big dreams?

Write down your goals somewhere. A napkin, the back of a piece of paper, a Instagram-worthy mood board… it doesn’t matter. Write down your goals no matter how big or small. Then, try to fill in the gaps in how you want to get from short-term goal to long-term goal. And finally, get ready to roll up your sleeves and put in lots of long hours and hard work.

In this age of side-hustles and entrepreneurial endeavors, we are constantly pressured to buy this system for these results, or automate this process for unparalleled growth, or hire a VA/build your team, I think it’s important to remember the core of it all is {strategic, focused, and smart} hard-work.

I love Yoda’s quote from Star Wars, “Do or do not, there is no try.” Really, it’s not rocket science but hard work does pay off.

Natalie at work during one of her Makeup Reset Workshop Series

More about Natalie Setareh – nataliesetareh.com

Natalie is a US-born makeup artist, educator, and aficionado based in the beautiful spa town of Wiesbaden, Germany. She offers a wide range of conventional makeup artistry services but also offers makeup education for non-beauty professionals, such as her popular Create Your Signature Look and Makeup Reset workshops. When she’s not making up, she’s hanging out or traveling with her two little kiddos and husband, teaching ice skating lessons for the local skating/hockey clubs, and seeking out amazing little coffee shops.

Natalie’s favorite quote is:

I see myself as a huge fiery comet, a shooting star. Everyone stops, points up and gasps. ‘Oh look at that!’ Then -whoosh, and I’m gone…and they’ll never see anything like it ever again… and they won’t be able to forget me- ever.
– Jim Morrison

Natalie’s Big Dream for the world:
I’d love to build a tuition-free makeup school specifically for refugees, asylum seekers, displaced people, and women escaping abuse, that upon graduation, gives them the skills and know-how in how to build a successful, portable, translatable makeup artistry business. Too many women in the beauty industry don’t get a fair deal and I want to change that!

If you want more inspiring stories, I’ve got great news for you! This story is part of an interview series, you can find all entries here.

Self-care tips for when you’re working hard to build your dream

Self-care didn’t always come naturally to me. In fact, I’d say that for the biggest part of my life I didn’t care much for my body. Or myself. I was too preoccupied with endless to-do lists, multi-tasking to make sure everything got done, and that everyone around me was happy first. Taking care of myself was something I’d do in the future, after all the other stuff I had going on. Of course I never got to that point. How could I make myself a priority when I kept on adding other things to my list first?

When I think back on that time now, I realize I lived my life as if I had no body at all. Everything happened from the top of my head up to my neck. Anything below that was a necessity, not a gift. At least, that’s how I used to look at it.

That doesn’t mean I didn’t exercise, or wasn’t aware of what I was putting into my body. Only I didn’t do it for the right reasons. I slept because I had to, I ate – most days much later than I should have and at my desk – not because I wanted to nourish my body but because I was so hungry I couldn’t ignore my poor body anymore. When I went to the gym it was because I felt I needed to look a certain way to fit in, not because I wanted a strong, healthy body. The thing is, our bodies are amazing machines that can cope with a lot of things, but in order to live a joyful, fulfilling, healthy life we need to do more than just keep ourselves physically alive.

My own decade-long habit of ignoring my body’s needs resulted in heaps of stress, aches and pains, headaches. I wasn’t the nicest person to be around either, especially early in the afternoon when I hadn’t eaten yet and was in full-blown hangry agony. Because of the prolonged hours I spent at my desk behind my laptop I always had cold hands and feet, and a sore neck and shoulders.

But the biggest issue was that I wasn’t nearly as productive as I could have been. Doing almost nothing to work toward my goals. During my work day I was easily distracted, stressed out, unhappy. At night I was exhausted. By not allowing myself to take a break or care for myself I was miserable.

So, what is self-care?

The World Health Organization restricts the meaning of self-care to the practices that keep you safe from disease, boost and restore your health, but in a more general sense, self-care could be defined as taking time to focus on yourself and your physical and psychological needs. It’s about reconnecting with your body to listen to its messages, quieting your mind and dealing with your emotions and feelings.

Is self-care another name for pampering?

Only if your idea of pampering is to give your body (and mind) what it needs to thrive and continue to serve you well in your mission to achieve your dreams.

In recent years, self-care started becoming more popular thanks to the work of self-care activists like poet Audre Lorde.

Caring for myself is not self-indulgence, it is self-preservation, and that is an act of political warfare.
– Audre Lorde

The idea is quite simple: if I don’t take care of myself, I won’t be able to keep fighting for the causes I believe in. If I don’t take care of my own needs, I’m not going to be able to help others get what they need either.

You’re a human being, not a robot

Something the South African writer Malebo Sephodi set out to remind people during a TEDx talk was that we need to allow ourselves to feel things. We’re human. We’re not robots designed to work or process information non-stop, and we need to take the time to reflect on who we are, who society expects us to be, and who we feel we should be – what we know is our true calling.

Self-care is an act of love and a tool for strengthening your body and mind. The bigger your dreams or goals, the bigger the risk of becoming overwhelmed, disengaged, or even sick while working hard to achieve them. Because you know that the reward will be so great, you risk pushing yourself too hard.

To help you work toward your big dreams in a meaningful way I’ve put together a list of self-care tips that I invite you to try, and (if you like them) integrate into your daily life. These tips have helped me to finally make friends with my body, and learn to treat myself well.

• Learn to release the tension in your body

You can do this through yoga, getting a massage (or giving yourself one), going to the gym, or even doing breathing exercises. For example, you can install the BreatheWell app on your phone (iOS, Android) and go through a breathing cycle any time you feel tense. You can start with a 4-second inhale, a 16-second hold, and an 8-second exhale.

• Sit on a bench in the park

Or step outside, or to your balcony for a few minutes. Just watch the people and the cars passing by, what’s unfolding around you without thinking about all the things you have to do. This will give your mind and body a relaxing break.

• Take a meditation break

Some people meditate for 2 hours a day, or more. It’s OK if you don’t have that long, 15 minutes or even less will be just as good. If you don’t know how to meditate, open a guided meditation on YouTube and listen to the indications or just focus on your breathing. [If you’re a member of the Big Dreamers Club, simply go through the meditation module Maja Savic created for us.] Meditation can help you live in the present and expand your consciousness, thus freeing you from the shackles of your own thoughts and emotions.

• Clean your desk or your room

Decluttering will make you feel more productive and will also help calm your mind. It’s really worth it to invest 15-20 minutes on cleaning up your workspace or personal space every day.

• Play a simple, mindless game

The awesome thing about games is that they capture your attention, so you can use them to give yourself a break, especially during stressful times. You can play a game on your phone or in your browser. A quick Google search will give you lots of options to choose from. So will asking children or teenagers!

• Make yourself a nourishing meal

It should be something you really want to eat and that’s also good for you. Usually, your body craves what it needs. So listen to it, and don’t postpone eating when you’re hungry, or eat less than your body needs. Remember that food is your body’s (and mind’s) fuel, and that you need it to be happy – and work on your dreams!

• Binge on some Netflix

Or watch a series or fun TV show. It doesn’t matter what you pick, as long as it’s not work in disguise. Don’t go to YouTube to learn more about subjects that matter to you at work, instead make sure to pick something that will amuse you, and will help you get your mind off things.

• Take a nap

Sometimes our bodies and minds need rest. Babies and young children do it often, and it’s easy to see the difference in mood before and after. The same is true for us. Whether it’s 10 minutes or half an hour, laying down to rest and closing your eyes for a little while can truly do wonders. Especially if you live a busy life with little time for yourself.

• Reach out to a friend

You’re not in this alone. Even though when you’re working your way through your to-do list you might feel you are. That’s why taking a break, and reaching out to a friend can do so much good. It doesn’t need to be a long conversation, or even a phone call. You can message a friend on Facebook, or exchange a few text messages through your phone. The point is to connect, and remember that a whole world is out there.

• Close the curtains and dance to your favorite song

Moving your body is one of the best ways to release tension, get some blood flowing through your body, and to remember you’re alive. If you feel up to it, try singing while you’re at it. Expressing yourself through your body can be a great way to get yourself out of the confines of your comfort zone, which in turn will not only boost your health but your creativity too!

• Put your thoughts on paper

Having dealt with anxiety for a big part of my life, I know all too well what it feels like to have too many things swirling in my mind. One trick that I’ve found to be helpful to release some of the mental stress that comes from having too many things in my head, is to write them down on a piece of paper. When I do it – and I’ve made it a habit to do this regularly – I can literally feel space freeing up inside my mind. The result? I’m calmer, less stressed, and I can focus better on what really matters.

If you like any of the tips, I invite you to put them into action. And in the comments below, let me know about it. But whatever you do, remember that you’re not a robot but a soul traveling through this world in a vessel made of flesh and bones. Take care of yourself!