Get Unstuck with Murielle Marie.
Weekly podcast for creatives & entrepreneurs.
#23 Grit: why it matters, and what you can do to get more of it
This week’s episode is inspired by my recent absence from this podcast while building new projects. There are many things you need to keep going when you’ve decided to venture out as an entrepreneur or when you’ve decided to finally pursue your dreams, whatever they may be. But one of the things you need the most, and that is currently not talked about enough, is grit. That’s why today, we're diving deep into the power of grit, the secret sauce that can make all the difference in our lives and businesses. So grab a cup of coffee, sit back, and let's embark on a journey to discover how we can cultivate more of this invaluable trait.
#22 The power of talking yourself into things instead of out of them
In today’s episode, we're going to delve into a fascinating topic: the power of talking ourselves into things instead of talking ourselves out of them.
So often, we find ourselves hesitating, doubting, and giving in to negative self-talk. But by shifting our mindset and embracing a positive self-narrative, we can unlock our true potential and achieve remarkable things. I’ve witnessed it in my life many times, and I see it in my coaching practice every day. That’s why I wanted to share about it in this episode. There is just so much to be gained from focusing on the positive instead of the negative. It’s truly life-changing.
#21 Don’t let your failures define you
This week, we’ll be exploring what it means to be stuck and find inspiration to live our best lives. I want to dive deep with you into the subject of failure, and how to not let it define you. I’m going to start by sharing some personal stories of failure - ahum - from my own life and entrepreneurial adventures. I’ll add in a few stories from my coaching clients and offer a bit of a philosophical perspective on why our failures don't define us. Plus, we'll explore how we can transform failures into positive experiences. Let's get started!
What’s the fear of failure and where does it come from? The fear of being wrong or making mistakes is often connected to perfectionism. And that’s certainly true. Being afraid of making a mistake or doing something “wrong” (quote - unquote) is something that we are conditioned into almost from the day that we’re born. As children we learn how to behave by being reprimanded for the mistakes that we make.
#20 How to stop systematically underestimating yourself
This week, I'll be discussing how to stop systematically underestimating yourself.
You know, when you're constantly putting yourself down, telling yourself you can't do something or that you're not good enough for a specific task. I'll discuss some techniques to help you recognize and reprogram your negative thought patterns and the power of reframing. Reframing has been so important in my life, and it's one of the techniques I often use with clients (or with you at the end of this episode) when I have them do real-life experiments. As a psychological technique, reframing helps us look at things, problems, challenges, ourselves, and our behavior from different angles. It can give us new perspectives and help us find new ways of being and experiencing the world in unexpected places.
So why do we tend to underestimate ourselves? It may stem from various factors, including low self-esteem, past failures, and societal pressures to conform to certain expectations. But whatever the cause, underestimating yourself can prevent you from achieving your full potential and living your desired life. Every time I dream up a big thing I want to do, when fear sets in, one of the things I do every single time is tell myself that I won't be able to make it. That's underestimating yourself. Perhaps you do it too. If you do, know that you're not alone. This is something so many people struggle with, often unconsciously.
#19 Are you afraid of your dreams? Stop sabotaging yourself, and become the person you want to be
In this episode, I’m discussing why we keep ourselves small and play it safe instead of taking risks and pursuing what we want. I used to think this was about being afraid of failing - because if you never try anything new or challenging, you can't fail either. But I'm not so sure anymore. I used to think I feared my dreams because I couldn't make them come true. But now, after many years of achieving my goals and helping so many other people achieve theirs, too, I think there might be something else going on: I'm not afraid I won't make it, I'm afraid that I will - I'm afraid of what I perceive to be the "enormity" of my dreams, and NYC definitely unlocked that feeling for me.
When I founded a software security start-up there back in 2015, I felt it too, but it was different. The dream was to try and see if it could work. When you put yourself in that headspace, you're not too attached to the outcome. Of course, you want it to succeed, but since you haven't done it before, it's healthy to be a little bit cautious about the potential success of your enterprise. At least, that is how I approach new things that I do and what I encourage my clients to do as well: you can't know for sure that something you've never done before will work. However, you can have a goal and do your best to achieve it. If you do: perfect! If you don't, no big deal: you learned something. And that learning will make it easier for you to succeed next time.
#18 How to learn to grow with your business growing pains
In this episode, I'm looking at business busy seasons up close and discussing strategies to manage the growing pains that accompany them. I will provide tips for staying sane when things get too busy and making the most out of these hectic times. I will also talk about why it's important to give ourselves permission to take a break every now and then, especially when we're under so much pressure.
Ever since I became an entrepreneur, I've struggled to reap the harvest of my hard labor. Sometimes I've planted seeds for months or years without seeing any sprouts come out. But each time, without exception, once they did, they all decided to come out at once! I remember one time, I'd just started the next iteration of my web agency; this was back in 2010-2012; I'd put out some ads online for specific services I wanted to offer, and suddenly, in a very short period of time (those were the good days of online marketing haha) my inbox was buzzing with all kinds of customer inquiries and projects. It was amazing but also such a learning curve.
#17 Things to consider to change careers successfully - and land your dream job
In this episode, I'm discussing career change and what to consider if you want to do it successfully. I've been a business and career coach for almost a decade, and through the years I’ve helped people transition into something new, I've realized there are certain key elements that will ensure your career change is a success.
Some things can make career transitions harder or not successful at all. One of those things, and perhaps the biggest one, is not to take at least a little bit of time to get to know yourself better and investigate the career you are considering. I often compare career change to dating. Just like you want to be clear on what's important to you in a partner and what you bring to the table, it's essential to get to know your potential career before you commit to it, just like you would do with a person.
#16 Imposter Syndrome: why we feel like frauds, even when we're successful
I've been plagued with the feeling that it's only a matter of time before someone finds out I don't really know what I'm talking about, that I'm not qualified for the job, that even though I've done well in the past, I probably won't do well in the future. It comes in waves; I have times of confidence and creative energy when I feel I can take on the world and produce a lot of work, and then other times, I feel like I'm worthless and that somebody is about to expose me as a fraud. This is common. I hear stories like that all the time. I have stories like that.
Impostor Syndrome is real and a burden for many creatives and entrepreneurs. At its core, it's about not being able to internalize your accomplishments; whatever you achieve, whatever your successes, you simply don't allow yourself to see or feel it. Let's talk about that for a minute because it's important. Why is it so hard for so many of us to accept that we're good at something? To appreciate our successes? To believe that we are capable?
In this week's episode I look at potential answers to this complex question.
#15 How to find your creative flow (and never stop creating)
Creativity is essential to success as an entrepreneur or creative professional, but it often takes work to get into a groove and consistently produces great work. Fortunately, finding creative flow isn't some crazy secret. The way to get flow is to create, engage your brain, focus, and work. I've learned how to get into that state, and I love it so much that I want more. It's like meditation, which is essential for my happiness and sanity.
In this week's episode, I dive deep into how understanding your own creative process can help spark innovation and productivity in every aspect of life – follow along as we explore the science behind creativity so that you can maximize yours!
So, if you're feeling stuck and uninspired when creating content - whether it's a podcast, blog post, article, book, video, spreadsheet, report, or anything else - this episode is for you.
#14 How to overcome perfectionism and stop sabotaging yourself
Perfectionism is often hard to spot. A lot is going on beneath the surface of hesitation and procrastination. It's a symptom of a bigger problem, usually due to low self-esteem or lack of trust in our abilities. It's been connected to a fixed mindset, the idea that your skills are set and you can't change them, and even to trauma and childhood wounds. Whatever the root cause, perfectionism is a protection mechanism created by our brains in response to our experiences as children (or even later in life) and the beliefs we have accumulated as a result.
I'm a recovering perfectionist. You should have seen me ten years ago. Unable to deliver any report or client work without finetuning it for weeks, often after procrastinating on getting started for at least that long. Today, I'm able to finish projects much faster, and more importantly, create better work in the process. More about how to overcome perfectionism, and how to stop sabotaging yourself in this episode.
#13 Feminist marketing and how I apply it in my business
Today I want to focus on feminist marketing and inclusive principles and how I apply them in my business. The people in my life, my friends and family, know that I'm a feminist who hates injustice, ignorance and thrives for inclusion; that I do active antiracist work, and how important it is to me for that to be reflected in my work.
Although this episode will share my best practices as an entrepreneur, whatever your work is, or even in your personal life, principles that put forth equality and justice are always sound and help shape a better and more equal world.
#12 What’s a creative generalist? And are you one?
Creative generalists are among my favorite kind of people. They're people - and I count myself as one of them, and so do many of my clients and friends - with a broad range of interests and skills across different fields. They could be teachers, entrepreneurs, artists, engineers, mathematicians, scientists, or any combination. Anyone could be a creative generalist, it simply depends on how their creative brain is wired and the way they choose to use it.
If you've been listening to my podcast, you might have heard me mention creative generalists a few times, and you may have wondered what exactly it is. If so, you’re in luck! For after this episode you’ll know all about it!
#11 How to stop caring what other people think of you
We all want to be liked and accepted in our lives, whether at work, in our family, at school, or socially. This is a natural and necessary inclination; we're born with it and develop it during childhood. But, when it reaches an excessive level, especially as adults, it can turn into a worrying and even paralyzing habit.
Here's the thing: You cannot control what others think of you.
The good news is it's possible to break free from this cycle of overthinking and worrying about what people think. That's what we explore in this week's episode.
#10 You are allowed to love your job
Let me state it loud and clear: You are allowed to love your job. It is your right to have a job that makes you happy. You don't have to stay stuck in a job that sucks the life out of you and doesn't fulfill you professionally or personally.
Somehow, doing work I love is something I have never questioned. From my first freelance job to what I'm doing now, even though I often let opportunities guide me, I've never had a job I hated - at least not for a long time. When I was doing things I was not particularly eager to do, I quickly moved into doing something else. It's true that I've been a freelancer, consultant, and entrepreneur my entire life, but hating your job is not just something for people stuck in the 9-to-5 or working for someone else. I know many self-employed people, entrepreneurs who despise their jobs, and they don't have to stay stuck there.
In this episode, I share how you can find and do work you love, even if it means leaving your current job. I discuss what steps you should take when looking for a new job, when you want to make the job you have more enjoyable, how to create your dream career, and how to set yourself up for success in a career that makes you happy.
#9 Your environment shapes your life
When working with people to help them get unstuck, I tend to return to what Jim Rohn, an American entrepreneur, author, and motivational speaker, famously said: “We’re the average of the five people we spent the most time with.”
From personal experience, I believe that statement to be true. When I look back on the environments I was in at specific periods of my life and what I was doing, I see a direct correlation between the people in my life and the decisions I was making or the dreams I was having.
This is what I want to talk about: that our environment influences our emotions, our emotions influence our thinking, our thinking influences our actions and our actions shape our life.
#8 It’s not because you know how to do something, that you should actually do it
Are you someone who gets excited about new ideas? Do you easily get carried away with your enthusiasm? Are you the one, when something needs to be done, whatever it is, that will raise a hand and say "I'll do it!"
If you said yes to any of these questions, then this episode is for you! Here I want to talk about something very important, both in your life and especially in your career or business, something that I took a long time to learn and that I tell creatives and entrepreneurs all the time: it’s not because you know how to do something, that you should actually do it.
#7 How to stop being too nice and become authentically assertive
Being polite or nice can be a way to be civil and courteous but also a way to avoid real engagement or confrontation. It can be a way to avoid conflict, because it's easier sometimes not to face the situation in front of us. I know that's how I avoided painful situations in the past.
Now, I still don't engage in conflict very much, but it's not out of fear, it's more in a "pick your battles" kind of way. I just decide when or not to engage in it. That is very different from avoiding conflict altogether or accepting other people's behavior without ever standing up for yourself.
I don't want to talk about that type of culturally accepted politeness that’s a superficial way of being nice or courteous. I want to talk about the type of "being too nice" that affects you in a negative way, in your life and at work or in your business.
Being too nice is the kind of attitude that makes you say "yes" to something you don't want to do, that makes you accept disrespect from others and that makes you put your own needs and beliefs aside in order to make someone else happy. The kind that makes a pushover out of you. That's the kind I’m talking about.
Do you feel addressed? Then this episode may be useful for you!
#6 How to stop procrastinating as a creative (aka, rebels also rebel against themselves)
We’re going to talk about your inner rebel! You have one, trust me! It's a funny character. It's keeping you from doing the stuff you say you’re going to do, making trouble but also making sure you don’t get trapped into a life without freedom.
Do you feel like this is you? Then you are in the right place! We will go into more depth about your inner rebel and how you can deal with it to move forward in everything you want to do!
All of that and a step by step explanation of how I write everything out in a paper planner from StructuurJunkie (The business planner edition) and how you can use my unique freedom schedule strategy in this episode! Let’s get started.
#5 The fear of change and learning how to deal with uncertainty
In my daily life it was very difficult to deal with so much stress and anxiety, especially as an entrepreneur who knew how useful it can be to take more risks and worry less. That’s why I’m so glad I’ve taught myself how to deal with it much better.
There’s no comparison between how anxious and uncomfortable I used to feel just thinking about change, and how I actually enjoy it now because I know that change equals growth, improvement, progress, moving towards your full potential. Without embracing change, I would not be where I am today and I would not feel as happy and successful as I do.
That’s what I talk about in this episode. What the fear of change and uncertainty actually is, how you can deal with it and how you can learn to let go of control in order to grow.
#4 Trusting yourself and not breaking promises to yourself to improve your self-confidence
It seems harmless to tell ourselves something one day and start doing something completely different the next, but this is far from the truth! We’ve been taught to keep promises to others, but we’ve never been told that the same applies to what we tell ourselves. Even though those promises are so much more important! The most important!
The biggest problem with this habit is that little by little, with each promise you break to yourself, you also undermine your self-confidence. If you get into a cycle of promising yourself that you will do something, but end up never doing it, you can lose confidence in yourself so much that eventually you just don't believe that you’re capable of anything - besides procrastinating that is.
Learning to not break the promises I made to myself has been crucial to achieve this. It seems trivial but in this episode I'll go into more detail about it, because it's been a real eye-opener for me, and I hope it will be for you too.